Mixed Feelings
by Iono
Summary: Heero finally lives a normal and simple life until two gundam pilots walk back into his life and he gets an invitation from Relena and a strange letter from someone unexpected. (Part 1)
1. M.F. One

  
  
Disclaimer: I am merely borrowing the personalities, names and surroundings of Gundam for this story and none of them are originally mine.  
  
Mixed Feelings   
  
Heero followed Duo and Hilde through the busy streets. He yawned in relief and smile at the bright blue sky. Finally, he could live a normal life as Heero Yuy and not as " that Gundam pilot". For the last two years, he spent most of his time getting settled in an apartment and finishing his education and he got a job as a technician at an airport. Thought he was living a normal life, he was alone. Heero and the other four young men hadn't seen each other for these two years but just a month ago Duo and Hilde moved the parts shop/ junkyard close to where Heero lived. Now Duo, Hilde and Heero spent most of there time going out to shops, markets, theatres and all around the vast city but Heero couldn't help wonder where Relena was.  
  
~  
  
Another speech. All Relena did now was make speeches, attend meeting and other events of the sort. She hardly had time for herself anymore. Even her brother made time to get married and raise children. She wanted her old life back. She wanted to go to school with her firends, who went on with their lives. She wanted to live with the only father and mother she knew and sometimes she wanted not to remember what happened in the war. She hugged her teddy bear tightly as she layed in her bed thinking about the speech she had to make infront of USUN. This kind of pressure wasn't for girls her age. Girls her age were going to proms or hanging with friends; she envied those girls.   
  
Relena stayed awake for another three hours thinking about, no not her speech, but her birthday that was tommorrow. She remembered dancing with Heero on her fifteenth birthday party and watching Heero on her sixteenth birthday from an airplane and the bear that would remind her of him for the next year. Just last year she remebered councilmen setting up a magnificant party with her brother and new wife Noin but there was no Heero that year or would be this year.  
  
~  
  
Duo stood in line to buy tickets for the show while Heero and Hilde waited for him at the entrance. Heero looked at Hilde and relized how much she changes. Her hair was a bit longer and neater and she didn't look as dirty as she did when she worked in the junkyard on the colonies. He wondered if anyone else had changed but one thing was for sure Duo hadn't changed one bit.  
  
Duo came over to them as his usually cheerful self and friendly slapped Heero on the back. His long braid which had cut shorter up to his mid back swung back and forth as the three walked into the tent and sat up in the stand where there was a good view of rings and high wire. Duo passed them all programs and left to buy them snacks. Heero didn't really liked the circus but didn't want to be stuck at home doing paperwork. He skipped through the thin program and found something that caught his eye.  
  
"Hilde, look, page twelve, it's Trowa and Catherine." Heero ponited out to her.  
  
"It really is Trowa! This is great!" she said as Duo sat down with a tub of popcorn and a tray full of candy apples.  
  
" What's so great, guys?" he asked curiously.  
  
"Trowa is in the show!" Hilde said excitedly.  
  
"Oh Trowa Barton. 'The five will be reunited once again', well that's what Quatre said before he left. Wonder what's he doing in a city like this."  
  
The show started as a group of clowns came out. One after another the clambered onto an elephant or horse and circled a metal cage. In the metal cage was a fierce lion and a clown that just stepped in. Suddenly, Hilde yelled, " TROWA!" and broke the silence. Trowa waved to them and the rest of the audience who began to cheer exictedly.  
  
They watched Trowa tame the lion and control it with hand movements. The lion began to jump through a ring of fire and do other amazing tricks that made the audience, "Ooo" and "Ahh". Then when all the tricks were finished Trowa sat on top of the lion and bowed his head. There was a wave of cheers and excitement as the clowns headed backstage and arcobats came out to the center ring.  
  
After the show, Heero, Duo and Hilde met up with Trowa. He was sitting with Catherine who was going through paper work. She left as soon as she saw them.  
Trowa greeted them and the four left to eat out in a restarant Heero suggested.  
  
~  
  
The next day, the decoraters was arguing which color the flower should be for the birthday party. Relena watched them as she waited for Pagan to start up the car.   
She shuffled the papers, reviewing them as Noin tied up her hair.  
  
"Guess what, Relena?" Noin tried to make conversation.  
  
"What?" Relena asked.  
  
"Mariemaia and Lady Une are coming over after the meeting with USUN and they're staying for the party. Now you'll have some company."  
  
"I don't need company, Lucrezia, I need friends my age."  
  
"Relena, I know it is hard for you to be the vice foreigh minister and being constantly away from your friends. It'll be okay, you just have to keep hoping, get me? Well I better go check in the kitchen."  
  
Noin left Relena puzzled. What did she mean by I have to keep hoping?, she thought. She piled up her papers neating and grabbed her coat. Pagan was already outside holding the limo door open. He wished her good luck and they drove off. She stared out the window and even if it was impossible, hoped desperatly Heero would come to her party.  
  
~  
  
"That was some meal! How'd you find such a great dinner, Heero?" Duo sounded amazed.  
  
"I go here all the time." Heero said with his eyes on the front door of his apartment.  
  
Heero unlocked the door and asked his guests to be seated. He sorted through his mail and found a beautiful envelope that had the scent of roses, that reminded him of Relena. He opened it and the scent exploded infront of Heero and was the most delightful thing he smelled. Inside the envelope was an elegant laced invitation. It was to Relena's 18th Birthday party. He smiled at it as he read it.  
  
"Heero, what's wrong?" Hilde asked in puzzlement.  
  
"He got an invitation to Relena's party." Trowa answered Hilde as he stared at Heero pleasantly for this was the first time he had seen him happy.  
  
Hilde smiled too, wondering what he was thinking. Duo hopped on to the couch and took a wiff of the rose scent and smiled foolishly. Suddenly Heero dropped his smile into a plain look when he saw everyone looking at him.  
  
"We got one to." Duo said rest his head on Hilde's shoulder.  
  
"Me too." Trowa said." It's tonight, are you coming, Heero?"  
  
Heero looked down and continued to shuffle through his mail. There was another letter but with no sender. He opened and read it carefully, hoping it was from Relena.  
  
Dear Heero Yuy,   
  
It has been three years since I saw you. I only know you as a great and invincible Gundam Pilot. You are terrific in my eyes. You showed everyone there was more to wars and battles than just killing your enemy. For that you and the other four Gundam pilots need memorial or awards. But I didn't put this in you mail box this morning to talk about fighting. I want to know the real you. The real Heero Yuy under Wing Zero. So please meet me at the park at 5:00pm . I'll be waiting under the memorial of the great martyred leader of the space colonies, you were named after.  
- Dorothy Catalonia  
  
Dorothy! His mounth hung opened and his eyes became confused. He looked up at the clock and it was already 4:40 but should he go? Duo jumped up from his seat and grabbed the letter. He smacked his forehead after reading the letter and that gave a signal to Trowa and Hilde to come over and read it as well.  
  
"Your going!" Duo exclaimed when he saw Heero grab his coat.  
" Duo, the war is over. She isn't going to kill me, especially in the park." Heero said.  
"But Heero, were talking about Catalonia! She probable wants to start a war again or something I dunno! She isn't very nice, if you know what I mean."  
"Didn't you tell I should trust more people and that not all people are bent on killing me?"  
"Yea, but-"  
"I'm going. I'm not going to stand her up, like I did to Relena at her birthday last year. So, you, Hilde and Trowa can wait for me here after you guys get ready for the party. Don't worry, I'm not going to stand you guys or Relena either." he said opening the door and walking out. 


	2. M.F. Two

  
Disclaimer: I am merely borrowing the personalities, names and surroundings of Gundam for this story and none of them are originally mine.  
  
Mixed Feelings (part 2)  
  
Relena sighed as she walked up the stairs of her home. Noin was waiting by the door with Lady Une and Mariemaia who was struggling to wave while holding her crutches. Relena smirked and greeted the two guests. They all walk into the ballroom which was decorated with white lace and ribbon and sweet smell of roses. Gold, red and white balloons were tied onto glasses boqueuts on marble podeums through out the large hall. Relena brought Mariemaia to her room so they both could get dressed.  
  
Servants were already preparing both dresses on her bed. Relena saw Mariemaia's face light up when one of the servant helped her get on a layered blue velvet dress, trimmed white lace . Mariemaia slowly spun around and kept clicking her white silk mary janes. The face of hopelessness suddenly disappeared from Relena's face. Relena dismissed the servants and put on her soft, layered white dress with a white, trimmed with rose red and gold. She put on her shoes and called back the servants to fix her and Mariemaia's hair.  
  
"Miss Relena, I'm happy you invited me." Mariemaia smiled at her as the servant curled her now collar length hair into tight ringlets.  
  
"Sorry to tell you Mariemaia, Lucruzia invited you." Relena sighed while the other servant pinned her hair up.  
  
"Oh...that's okay. Well, so, who did you invite?" the little girl asked curisously  
  
"Lucruzia invited everyone. I was too busy with ESUN." Relena said softly.  
  
"It's too bad you can't go out anymore. I'm going to the circus this weekend. You could of come."  
  
"I don't think I could. I have to visit some officails in Arabia tommorow."  
  
"Anyway, I hope Heero is coming! He still owes me a quarter from the arcade game last week but really, I just really want to see him again." she giggled.  
  
"You know were Heero is?!" Relena almost jumped out of her seat with her eyes wide open.  
  
"Of course I do. Me and Miss Une was at the airport when we saw him. He seemed really happy than he was two year ago. Ever since then, Miss Une would drop me of at his house and we'd have lots of fun. It's a good thing too because I hate staying in rehab all week. Anyway recently his friend Duo Maxwell and Hilde have been coming with us and they're real fun, especially Duo."  
  
"Who've seen Duo too?"  
  
"Yes, Miss Relena. Matter of fact, there going to circus with me. Duo called me this morning and said they were going to check if it's good for me, er something, today."  
  
Relena's eyes were wide open as she listened to Mariemaia talk about Duo, Hilde and especially Heero. She was totally shocked but felt happy at the same time. Even if Heero wasn't going to be at the party she could possible see him tomorrow if Noin let her.  
  
~  
  
Before Heero could get out the door, Hilde grabbed his shoulder and whispered closely to his ear. "Heero, if you plan on bring Catalonia with you, I'll be okay with it but I don't think those two will." Trowa and Duo had these astonished and annoyed faces that slightly disturbed Heero as he nodded to Hilde and left for the park. He felt a bit excited and nervous even thought he didn't want to admit it to himself.  
  
Heero got to the park a little after 5 and started walking around the park. There were little children that reminded him of MarieMaia and how he couldn't wait until tomorrow. Mariemaia had been visiting him for about three months already and it was a joy having her around. His emptiness would be filled with happiness just like what Relena did with her kindness. He thought long and hard about Relena and all those times with her. He didn't know how much he loved until he opened that invitation but he never knew how to express his feelings for her. Sometimes he was too afraid to.  
  
He put his hands in his pockets and sat on a wooden bench across the statue of the real Heero Yuy. Where is she?, he thought. Suddenly he saw long blond hair blow in the wind behide the statue and immediatly stood. He waited for awhile and for every minute that passed he questioned himself, What am I doing here?   
  
"Dorothy?" he called out. Then a figure came out from behide the memorial toward him. It was Dorothy but she changed. Her hair was shorter and wavy and the scent of lavenders surrounded her.Her eyes weren't sharp with curelity anymore but gentleness. For an instant, he forgot about Relena. She smiled sweetly at him and suggested they go to a coffee shop were they could talk.  
  
"So Heero Yuy, what have you been up to?" she rested her head on her hand.  
  
"I'm a technician at the airport but first things first. Why did you call me here?" he asked suspisously.  
  
"I just wanted to talk to you, that's all. I've been so mean to you, I guess I got caught up in the war." she explained.  
  
"So how'd you find me?"  
  
"Well, I work with Lady Une now. She told me Mariemaia was with you one weekend and she told me to pick her up and she gave me your address."  
  
"Okay that's one thing straight, but I thought you were dead? "  
  
"Well I got away before that could happen." she giggled and made Heero blush.  
  
They talked for hours and then Heero brought her to get his tuxedo for Relena's party. He found out she was going to Relena's party too and afterwards, they went to pick up her dress and walked back to his apartment.  
  
"Thanks for the great time." she said softly, silencing Heero. They stared at each other for a while until she unexpectedly she kissed him. He immediatly pulled back and looked at her with the same face Duo gave him before he left.   
  
"What was that for!" he exclaimed.  
  
"I'm so sorry Heero. I thought you were going to so.. I thought you liked me." she said.  
  
"No, I don't! My feelings are for Relena not you." he paused as she began to bow her head in disapointment. "Don't be like that. I didn't mean to yell at you like that but you..."  
  
"I understand. Let's go as friends, okay."  
  
"Sure."  
  
Heero opened the door. The three were already there. Duo was sitting next to Hilde, watching television while Trowa was bringing their tuxedos into Heero's room. Hilde got up and smiled at Dorothy. She greeted her and called Trowa out. Duo gave Heero an annoyed face but greeted Dorothy anyway. Trowa came out of the room calmly and shook hands with Dorothy who giggled at him. He turned red. Then Hilde showed Dorothy to the guest room where they changed and the boys changed in Heero's room.   
  
"So, Heero. Where'd you go?" Duo asked him.  
  
"We went to the coffee shop and to pick up my tuxedo and her dress that's all." Heero said as he put on his pants.  
  
"She lives around here?"   
  
"On 84th street. She works with Lady Une."  
  
"You guys musta had a good time because you took at least three hours, buddy."  
  
"So."  
  
"Is she nice?" Trowa asked before Duo could say anything.  
  
"Yeah, she's changed alot." Heero answered.  
  
"So hit it off?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"I mean are you guys together."  
  
"How could you think such a thing, Trowa."  
  
"Did -" Trowa was cut off by Duo.  
  
"Did ya at least kiss her?" Duo asked.  
  
Heero sighed and buttoned up his shirt. "She did."  
  
"She what?!"  
  
"You heard me. She kissed me."  
  
"Well was it good?"  
  
"I pulled back. I don't like her like Relena."  
  
There was silence for a minute. Finally Heero admitted he loved Relena but what would Relena think when he told her. Duo smiled and slapped his back and mumbled under his breath, " I knew he loved her."Trowa nodded as he put on his vest and tie. Trowa put on his jacket and looked at himself in the mirror. Then he picked up the invitation and smiled with delight. The scent of roses was still on the invitation and Heero smirk as the smell filled the room. After two years he would see his Relena.  
  
~  
  
The ballroom was already filled with chatter and music. Relena stood with Mariemaia as she greeted the guests. There were mostly officails from USUN and other organizations, she knew none of them. More people started to arrive and Relena was tired of greeting old people. She constantly look around for Heero, expecting him to come. She even asked Noin if he was coming but she really didn't know.   
  
Mariemaia was getting tired too so she went over where Lady Une was sitting. Alone, Relena was again. No one to chase, no one tell stop fighting and no one to help. She saw couples dancing and it reminded her of the first time she dance with Heero. It was on her 15th birthday. All her friends were there and she didn't need to wear a dress that night. Heero had decided to stay even though then, he wanted to destory her. It was only for a few minutes she was in her arms but it was the best few minutes of her life. Then left her behide.  
  
She didn't deserve this. None of this. She didn't want to be spoiled or be the vice foriegn minister. She wanted a normal life, that wasn't so empty and meaningless. She wanted to be with Heero who was the only one she could ever love. Tears began run down her face but she stopped it before anyone could see her sadness.  
  
~  
  
"How long does it take girls to dress?" Duo said impatiently." Hey girls, we'll meet you down in the limo."  
  
The fully and neatly dressed young men went ouside and waited . Finally the girls came out. The looked stunning. Hilde had flowing light blue dress with a short tail and her collar length hair was finally let down. Duo hugged her and both of them went inside the limo. Dorothy wore a plain black knee length dress and didn't bother to fix her hair. Though she still looked, as Heero put it "okay". Trowa on the other hand thought she looked beautiful. The three got in the limo and rode off to Relena's mansion.  
  
"Whoa! This is Relena's place." Hilde exclaimed.  
  
"Well are we going to go in, or are we going stare at the house all night." Trowa urged them to go in.  
  
Inside, Hilde gasped at the decorations and the ballroom. Noin welcomed them in and left to join Milyardo who was chatting with USUN officails. Dorothy looked nervous as her eyes wandered hopelessly at Milyardo. Then Heero saw Relena walk by and Duo went after her. She was more beautiful than he imagined. He was about to walk over to her when Dorothy pulled on his sleeve. She looked lost and confused.  
  
"Heero." she whispered."Go to Relena and tell her what you think of her, I know she feels the same about you."  
  
"I should, shouldn't I." he gulped.  
  
"Don't be afraid." she stared deeply and more nervously than ever. "Thank you again for meeting with me and I'm real sorry." she said and then suddenly hugged him.   
  
"Your Welcome." he said as she let go and followed Noin.  
  
Heero turned again and his eyes met with Relena's but this time there was something wrong. Tears were running down her face and her eyes were looked hurt and angry but at the same time sad. Her lips trembled and then she ran out into the garden. Heero was stunned. What's wrong?, he thought. As Hilde and Trowa put their hand on his shoulders. Duo came running over with a worried face.  
  
"I'm sorry, buddy. I slipped. I accidently told her about Dorothy." Duo said.  
  
"What?!" Heero jumped.  
  
"She asked me why Dorothy was here and things lead to more things, if you know what I mean."  
  
"Go Heero, she needs to know the truth from the one she loves." Hilde sighed.  
  
"Don't worry. She loves you too and she knows you don't love Catalonia. Go on." Trowa said softly taking his hand off his shoulder.  
  
"Here. Gives this to her as a sign of your love. Don't chicken out now. How could the great gundam pilot Heero Yuy be afraid of anything." Duo said, giving him a red rose.  
  
They were right Relena deserved to know that he loved only her. He ran out the door but slowed down when he saw her sitting by a fountain and a bed of voilets. He walked over to her and heard her weeps become louder and more hurtful. He sat besides her with her back infront of him and ran his fingers through Relena's soft, hazel hair.  
  
~  
  
She continued crying but more softly. The moon shined bright over her and who ever was behide her. She looked up at the stars and prayed it was Heero.  
  
"Don't cry Relena." a familar voice said.  
  
Could it really be, Heero? She closed her eyes as he ran his gentle fingers through her hair. She turned slowly and nervously. It was Heero! Finally, she was face to face with him but she remember what Duo told her and when she saw Heero hugging that evil Dorothy, so she slapped him in the face, regretfully. He rubbed his cheek and bowed his head.  
  
"I deserve that." he said, looking up at her.  
  
She suddenly looked down, afraid to look into his sweet, mild blue eyes. She cried silently, not knowing what Heero was thinking about her now. She wiped her tear but more followed. Why couldn't she just tell him she loved him?  
  
~  
  
Heero was uncertain what the slap meant but he had an idea what. He gave her the rose which she nervously took and for a brief moment looked into his eyes but then back into he lap. He sighed and wiped her tears.  
  
"Oh Relena. Don't cry." Heero pleaded.  
  
"Why did you do that?" Relena finally spoke.  
  
"I'm not with Catalonia. I don't even like her. She was just in the neighborhood and I felt bad she was going alone."  
  
"So. Doesn't mean you have to go bringing her and hugging her and kissing her and then send Duo to tell me you care for me. I don't even believe you now!"  
  
" She was thanking me for taking her with us.", he corrected. "She hugged me and kissed me but I did decide to take her with me."  
  
"But why!" she moaned and then Heero hugged her tightly.  
  
"I love you and that's the truth." he whispered softly.  
  
~  
  
Relena let go of Heero. Then she finall looked into his eyes and knew he was telling the truth. She felt bad she ever doubted him and that she slapped him.  
  
"I love you, too." she managed to say. " I shouldn't of got jealous. It's all my fault. I just wanted to be with you so badly."  
  
"It's not your fault, Relena. It's my fault. I should of told you how I felt a long time ago. If I did, this wouldn't of happened and we wouldn't have been separated for so long." Heero said raising her chin.  
  
"Why did you leave me?" she whispered.  
  
"I never did."  
  
Then, their noses touched and their lips were together. They slowly pulled back and stared deeply into each others' eyes . For the the first time in two years, Relena was happy and Heero wasn't lonely.  
  
Epilogue coming soon. 


	3. M.F. Epilogue

  
Disclaimer: I am merely borrowing the personalities, names and surroundings of Gundam for this story and none of them are originally mine.  
  
Epilogue of Mixed Feelings (Part One and Two)  
  
I hope you liked this story and for those who didn't read Mixed Feelings, GO READ IT NOW! (Point of veiw of Heero Yuy)  
  
In a month, Duo moved in with me so Relena could move in with Hilde who rented the apartment across from mine. Relena resigned from her position as vice foreign minister of USUN and got a job as Lady Une's secretary. She with Dorothy at an office on 93rd street but she still finds time to be with me and the others.  
  
Also, Mariemaia was starting to walk properly and Duo and I planned to bring her to an amusement park. Since Relena's eighteenth birthday, Mariemaia was become happier. Not only was she going to school with other children now, she worked at the circus. Her and Trowa have an act together with knife throwing after Catherine Bloom left to live with her sick grandfather.  
  
Trowa got a part time job at a middle school as a gymnastics coach. He really enjoyed being with kids. Also he has been very talktive now he was seeing Dorothy but I don't think it would last. Duo agrees with me. He's been seeing Dorothy since after the party.  
  
Well, Dorothy was helping Relena get adjusted. We see her working now at the coffee shop. Hilde suspects that she quit so Relena could have a job. Dorothy still regrets what happened before but I'm over it. I love Relena and that's all what matters.  
  
Two years later, Duo proposed to Hilde. I'm regretfully his best man. I thought he'd pick Quatre or something. I'm personally not the kinda guy to go weddings unless it's mine. Relena is Hilde's maid of honor and they have been scurrying everywhere, preparing the wedding while Duo and I set up the guest list.  
  
The day of the wedding was all prepared and as planned. After the cermony, we went to an expensive chinese resturant for the respection. Duo and Hilde were the perfect match; happy, perky and brave. Hilde looked especially beautiful; her white layered dress elegantly dragged behide her and her hair was up in a twisting bun but my eyes were on Relena. We met up with Quatre, Wufei, Sally and others. It was one of the most joyful and happiest event I have ever been too (which was rarely).  
  
By the end of the Reception, it was time to congratulate the bride and groom. I got up last and said a few things (" Hope you two are very happy") and then bent down on one knee infront of Relena. I proposed to her and our wedding was a year from then.  
  
Finally, I will never be alone and Relena will never shed tears of sadness again.  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
